After the Love is Gone

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Hello everyone…

Whether you are broken hearted from the loss of a loved one, marriage, family, an ex lover….No matter what you situation, now matter how down you may feel right now….I will make a promise to you all….no matter where you are in the world…

THINGS WILL GET BETTER……if you allow them to.

I added the “if you allow them to” because alot of us assume time is the answer….I agree to a certain extent but I believe the truth lies in allowing yourself to heal.

One thing we know that never changes is that time never stops. Time always moves forward….we can’t stop it…..like death…it is certain.

Years ago, I was hurt like so many of you out there. I couldn’t do anything without letting the sadness overtake me. I, without me knowing, put my happiness on someone else. If I couldn’t have them, I couldn’t be happy. For those out there that have this type of mentality, you have my sympathy. I could not have been more wrong. I spent months crying, obsessing about my situation, my life without her, and why this was happening to me.

Plain and simple, I had a lesson to learn….a very hard lesson. It wasn’t til I was at my lowest point that I realized that it wasn’t punishment from God…or whatever you believe….it was something that “Life” was teaching me. Ask any elderly person out there what “life” lessons that have learned in there time here on earth and I can almost guarantee they can go on and on…the reasoning is because they HAD to learn.

When I was a child, I tried to put my hand on the eye of a stove when it was turned on….it was hot but my mother pulled my hand back before I could do so….what did I learn from it?

Two things

1. The eye of a stove can be very hot and I could get burned….
2. Listen to other people that are more experienced…they have lessons to teach.

I know you may be hurting right now. I cried many nights into a pillow as a 34 year old man because I “couldn’t live with out her”. I cried in the shower….I cried at work…I cried in the car when a certain song would play because I would think of my past with her…

Been there …done that. I am living proof ladies and gentlemen that if you stop and DO YOUR BEST to look at the lesson rather than the problem that you will begin to learn…

Am I insinuating you have done something wrong or is the reason why you are in your current situation because of something YOU did?

NOT AT ALL…not even close.

What I have come to realize in my short time on this earth, that if I die tomorrow, ….that no one…BUT NO ONE can prevent me from loving me.
Is this selfish to say? No. I disagree with anyone that would challenge me. When I look in the mirror, I see me. I do not see anyone else BUT me. I know what I am thinking at all times. I know my thoughts, I know MY dreams, I know what I like, I know what I don’t like, I know what makes me happy, I know everything about me..without guessing nor assuming anything.

No one is responsible for my happiness BUT ME. What does this mean? It means I love the people that come in and out of my life and appreciate each one individually and the lessons they teach me. There are so many wonderful things in the world we DON’T appreciate because we put too much emphasis on the very thing we assume is responsible for our complete happiness and when it is gone………we become “lost”.

When do we appreciate things the most? Sadly, most of us at one time or another tend to appreciate it only after it is gone….or we can’t have it anymore. People sadly get taken for granted every day. I have learned to appreciate everything about me and my life circumstances. I have such positive energy inside and out that it radiates in all I do.

I learned to pick myself up and move on. Was it hard….Absolutely! The things in life that we think are the most difficult, tend to be the very things when we overcome it, no matter if it is a problem in our lives or maybe a math problem on the blackboard, that make us the proudest.

Why is this? I will tell you….

When we don’t believe we can do something….and we end up doing it and doing well…we are in disbelief and shock because we actually took the time to provide a solution for ourselves. No one lives our lives but us…the individual.

We all have hopes and dreams…..we all have individual goals we may have had for years….before your current situation ever occurred. How many time I have heard the same thing over and over…

“I wish I had never met “.

Why? Why is it that when negative things occur, that we always look at the negative instead of the positive. Looking back on life, I have said this silly statement before. I am guilty as charged but I have learned to be a better person for it.

What have I learned? I have learned that being negative only brings more negativity. Some call it the “Law of attraction”…I call it common sense.
We all have choices….some are easier to make than others. I am not by any means trying to give an overall solution….but providing “food for thought”. We make poor choices, have done stupid things….say hurtful things we didn’t mean….we have learn to hate…instead of being the better person. As a chlid, we learned that lying COULD get you out of trouble….and the truth can be so difficult to tell sometimes not only for us…but for those it involves.

You can be happy….no matter how down you are…no matter how lonely…no matter how defeated you may feel….YOU CAN DO ANYTHING if you allow yourself to.

If someone doesn’t love you…….I am sorry….NOT for you…BUT FOR THEM……

Read that again…

If someone doesn’t love you…….I am sorry….NOT for you…BUT FOR THEM……

You are a treasure…..you are a gift that is to be appreciated until you take your last breath. You can make a difference in your own life NOT to worry about what someone else my say or assume about you.

NO ONE but NO ONE..knows you best…..THAN YOU! Self love can be the most difficult lesson you can learn. We tend to dream of that “someone” that will come along and just understand how we work and feel. Some call this our soul mate. Do I believe in soul mates….? Not really….I believe in me 100%. I have too much love to give for free to the people that SHOW ME LOVE.

Actions speak louder than words…..don’t let words stand in your way. Don’t ever let ANYONE tell you that you can’t do anything…

You can do anything….no matter what it is…

All you have to do is believe in yourself. If you have made mistakes in your life up to this point….don’t push blame….take responsibility for ONLY the things you need to and learn from it…move on and teach those who will be in your situation possibly down the road.

Don’t be afraid….fear can only hold you back. Let it go…let go of the “what if’s…” Go with what you know is a fact….not what you assume or wish….

To each and everyone of you…I want you to know something…

No matter who you are….no matter where you are…no matter how down and out you may feel….

there is hope…there is forgiveness….there is a lesson…and there is a long, and happy life waiting for you on the otherside of your sadness.

Forgive yourself of past mistakes and move on…..love yourself and let yoru confidence SHINE bright. Radiate what you have learned and SMILE again! You can do it….I am living proof that you can do it.

All it takes is a simple decision to let go of sadness and past hurt…

You can do it….Ya wanna know why? You may be sitting there reading this post doubting every word I say….but listen carefully

I mean this with all I am ….

I believe in you…..and all that you are.

Your Friend,

SuperDave71

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